From the Blue Guide to Indiana, a satire by Michael Martone

Excerpt from The Blue Guide to Indiana, by Michael Martone, a tongue-in-cheek look at Indiana places. FC2 published the book in 2001.

The Mothball Fleet of Garbage Trucks

Beech Grove

To this suburb outside of Indianapolis come the retire garbage and trash hauling trucks declared as surplus or redundant by municipal entities and sanitary districts nationwide. Here, stripped of their more valuable electric components, gleaned of their hydraulics, drained of fuel and fluid, the trucks’ tires are removed and the remaining frames and bodies are placed on blocks at sabotage-discouraging intervals, The vehicles are prepared for indefinite storage in anticipation of future reactivations during expected, though undesirable, cartage emergencies. The retired trucks may also serve as sources for needed spare parts, cannibalized by skilled teams of roving technicians. The humid climate of these former soybean fields south of the capital city, provides a pristine environment for such mothballing, assuring a fleet of heavy duty trucks in a ready reserve.

Walking tours of the site are available, where the visitor will be amazed by the variety and ingenuity displayed in the handling of kitchen garbage, rubbish, ashes, sawdust, and trash of all description.  More poignant are the remains of decorative display such as cartoon characters, beloved names and names of beloveds adorning their air-brushed images, and scripts of catchy slogans applied to the cabs of the trucks by their zealous crews. “Litterbug,” “Stuff It!” “Outta Sight, Outta Mind!” Stenciled along the flanks of fender after fender are icons representing countless missions performed. Here, affixed to a rust-specked grill by means pf twist ties, the remains of a teddy bear or doll baby rescued from a bin. There, a playful hood ornament of eight ball, cookie jar, or electric fan, handiwork of a bored driver stuck on line at the scales of some remote landfill. Picnic areas with cook stoves are scattered around the lots as well as latrines and potable water spigots, but note that the facility has no trash receptacles, and everything packed into the site must be brought out again by the hiker.